“Crayons Can Melt On Us For All I Care” by Relient K – Chords, Tabs, & How to Play

“Crayons Can Melt On Us For All I Care”
Relient K

(Capo 3)

G     Em       Am               Cm       G
I just wasted ten seconds of your life.

Yes, No, or Maybe So: One-Sentence Reviews of 2009 Albums

(Arranged in ascending order by release date)

With so many albums being released every week, what are they all like?  Which are worth your time?  These one-sentence reviews are the answers to those questions!

Battle Studies – (John Mayer) – MAYBE

(November 17, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: Battle Studies may not be Mayer’s best work, but as a thoughtfully arranged collection of songs, it’s head and shoulders above Continuum. Top Two Tracks: “Heartbreak Warfare” – “Assassin”

Alter the Ending – (Dashboard Confessional) – MAYBE

(November 10, 2009) Review: About mid-way through, some tracks begin to blend together, but there are some standout songs that are both upbeat and engaging. Top Two Tracks: “Belle of the Boulevard” – “Until Morning”

Sainthood – (Tegan and Sara) – MAYBE

(October 27, 2009) Review: Their best work since So Jealous. Top Two Tracks: “Someday” – “Don’t Rush”

One Fast Move or I’m Gone – (Jay Farrar & Ben Gibbard) – MAYBE

(October 20, 2009) Review: Not a breathtaking masterpiece by any means, but there is a hypnotic quality to the combination of Farrar and Gibbard’s sounds and Jack Kerouac’s words. Top Two Tracks: “These Roads Don’t Move” – “California Zephyr”

The Fountain – (Echo & the Bunnymen) – MAYBE SO

(October 12, 2009) Review: Most reviews have jumped to the extremes, and mine is no exception; The Fountain is an outstanding rock album from a band that most major music magazines have essentially ignored. Top Two Tracks: “Live of a Thousand Crimes” – “Drivetime”

Forget and Not Slow Down – (Relient K) – YES

(October 6, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: Hands down the best concept album of the year, perhaps the best album of the year overall. Top Two Tracks: “Part of It” – “Sahara”

Backspacer – (Pearl Jam) – YES

(September 20, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: This is the album that may single-handedly be responsible for my eventual hearing loss – it’s simply too much fun not to listen to at high volumes. Top Two Tracks: “Got Some” – “Speed of Sound”

Levitate – (Bruce Hornsby & the Noise Makers) – NO

(September 15, 2009) Review: I try to avoid comparisons to past work, but this new Hornsby album is just a little too far out from the norm for my tastes. Top Two Tracks: “Space is the Place” – “In the Low Country”

A Brief History of Love – (The Big Pink) – NO, PLEASE, NO!

(September 14, 2009) Review: I’m reminded of the Byrds song “Everybody Gets Burned” – if you have any respect for rock music, steer clear of this album and do your best to never consider this band and the amazing debut release of The Band (to which their name alludes) in the same thought. Top Two Tracks: n/a

Humbug – (Arctic Monkeys) – MAYBE SO

(August 25, 2009) Review: The distance between how little I like early songs like “I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor” compared with how much I like this new release is vast; overall, Humbug has a cohesive, infectious, and interesting sound, blending alternative rock/punk stylings with echoes of the Who and the Moody Blues in all the right places. Top Two Tracks: “Crying Lightning” – “Cornerstone”

My Old, Familiar Friend – (Brendan Benson) – MAYBE SO

(August 18, 2009) Review: From “A Whole Lot Better” onward, Benson’s latest release is joyful power pop that borrows generously from the sixties and seventies; it’s a great deal of fun from start to finish. Top Two Tracks: “Garbage Day” – “Misery”

Release – (Sister Hazel) – MAYBE NOT

(August 18, 2009) Review: This album is the perfect choice for background music: it is consistently upbeat without being too frenetic, certainly won’t offend anyone, and yet isn’t likely to inspire or even excite anyone either – the heinous typos in the booklet don’t help their cause. Top Two Tracks: “Vacation Rain” – “Ghost in the Crowd”

Ursa Major – (Third Eye Blind) – MAYBE NOT

(August 17, 2009) Review: There will supposedly be another 3eb release soon titled Ursa Minor, culled from tracks that didn’t make the cut for this album; suffice it to say that Ursa Major gets an “eh” and barely a “Maybe Not” rating with the so-called best songs from their recent sessions, so… Top Two Tracks: “Bonfire” – “Summer Town”

xx – (The xx) – MAYBE SO

(August 17, 2009) Review: This debut release by the xx is a gripping, murky, beautiful collection of songs that won’t fail to draw you in to their world each listen. Top Two Tracks: “VCR” – “Shelter”

The Ruminant Band – (Fruit Bats) – MAYBE SO

(August 4, 2009) Review: Aptly titled after the Fruit Bats took twice as long as usual to release this record, The Ruminant Band is worth all the extra wait time:  still quirky but with a lot more energy, backbeat, and attention to making a great album, rather than just a compilation of songs. Top Two Tracks: “The Ruminant Band” – “Singing Joy to the World”

Strange Cousins From The West – (Clutch) – MAYBE NOT

(July 14, 2009) Review: You’ll have to go back to Blast Tyrant or so if you want original, innovative Clutch; what you’ll find here is confined by the blues parameters the band has imposed on themselves – which is not to say you won’t find largely powerful performances of largely predictably structured songs and a couple true gems. Top Two Tracks: “50,000 Unstoppable Watts” – “Minotaur”

Horehound – (The Dead Weather) – MAYBE SO

(July 14, 2009) Review: The Dead Weather certainly deserve credit for having forged a unique sound and presence – Jack White best described their music as “ferocious” – but the riffing, repetition, and other indulgences can be distracting; overall, as a debut release, Horehound is promising… Top Two Tracks: “I Cut Like A Buffalo” – “Hang You From the Heavens”

Ocean Eyes – (Owl City) – MAYBE

(July 14, 2009) Review: A bit too placid for me, but I can perceive at least part of the reason that this album’s simple, soothing numbers have spread so quickly and been embraced by so many. Top Two Tracks: “Fireflies” – “The Bird and the Worm”

American Central Dust – (Son Volt) – NO

(July 7, 2009) Review: As the title implies, Son Volt’s latest album could have been found buried in a collection of Americana; while it certainly hits high points on certain tracks, the simplicity of the arrangements and even the packaging (no lyrics – really?) confine this album to mediocrity. Top Two Tracks: “No Turning Back” – “Jukebox of Steel”

Leaving Wonderland…in a fit of rage – (Marcy Playground) – MAYBE

(July 7, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: Overall, Leaving Wonderland hits emotional pay dirt with the theme of losing love and youth to the ravages of time, and yet John Wozniak’s lyrics and arrangements leave much to be desired in terms of depth and artistry. Top Two Tracks: “Gin and Money” – “I Burned the Bed”

Wilco (the album) – (Wilco) – YES

(June 30, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: An atypically brief release, Wilco (the album) is dominated by a wide range of interesting sounds and ideas all packed into tight tracks that ebb and flow just right; multiple listens are a must. Top Two Tracks: “Wilco (the song)” – “You Never Know”

Big Whiskey & the GrooGrux King (Dave Matthews Band) – MAYBE

(June 2, 2009) Review: “DMB” has produced a very strong album that starts off with focused, expressive tracks yet lags somewhat in the second half’s instrumental, repetitive, and nonsensical indulgences. Top Two Tracks: “Funny The Way It Is” – “Time Bomb”

Secret, Profane, and Sugarcane (Elvis Costello) – MAYBE SO

(June 2, 2009) Review: Finally, a stripped-down recording from a rock artist that doesn’t reek of the urge to “jump on the acoustic train”; Costello’s songs here could just as convincingly  have been recorded a century ago. Top Two Tracks: “Complicated Shadows” – “Sulphur to Sugarcane”

21st Century Breakdown (Green Day) – YES

(May 15, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: Another concept album of epic proportions from Green Day:  big, in-your-face power chords at some points, acoustic guitar and piano high in the mix at others, and strong vocals all around – a well-executed album from start to finish. Top Two Tracks: “Last Night on Earth” – “East Jesus Nowhere”

Together Through Life (Bob Dylan) – MAYBE SO

(April 28, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: As per usual, Dylan says it best: “I know my fans will like it; other than that, I have no idea.” Top Two Tracks: “Shake Shake Mama” – “I Feel a Change Comin’ On”

Tinted Windows (Tinted Windows) – NO

(April 21, 2009) Review: I remembered while listening to this that there’s a reason I stopped buying Fountains of Wayne albums since Traffic & Weather, and there’s certainly a reason I’ve never bought Hanson albums. Top Two Tracks: “Back With You” – “Nothing to Me”

Halfway There (Jim Fusco) – YES

(April 7, 2009) – CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: It’s as if all of Fusco’s previous work was only “halfway there” – combining ambitious vocals, innovative guitar parts, and a track listing that boasts eleven great songs, this is easily one of the great albums of 2009. Top Two Tracks: “I Got You” – “Ruins”

The Hazards of Love (The Decemberists) – MAYBE NOT

(March 24, 2009) Review: The Hazards of Love will keep you guessing and trying to piece it all together, but it may not get a lot of immediate repeat listens based on the quality of individual songs; kudos to the Decemberists if only for keeping the concept of the concept album alive and well! Top Two Tracks: “The Wanting Comes in Waves/Repaid” – “The Hazards of Love 4 (The Drowned)”

No Line On The Horizon (U2) – MAYBE NOT

(March 3, 2009) Review: There’s something to be said for Bono’s energy, but it’s not always enough on this record which fluctuates between moments of mastery and moments of mediocrity. Top Two Tracks: “I’ll Go Crazy If I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight” – “Stand Up Comedy”

Keep It Hid (Dan Auerbach) – MAYBE

(February 10, 2009) Review: Essentially, what you would expect — gritty, bluesy rock with excellent guitar work. Top Two Tracks: “Heartbroken, In Disrepair” – “My Last Mistake”

Working On A Dream (Bruce Springsteen) – MAYBE SO

(January 27, 2009)  –  CLICK HERE FOR A FULL REVIEW Review: The past three Springsteen albums have been exercises in purposeful songwriting, raw acoustic and harmonica work, and upbeat pop/rock respectively — Working On A Dream has it all! Top Two Tracks: “What Love Can Do” – “Life Itself”

The Weekend Review: October 2011 Report

By Chris Moore:

 

Is for Karaoke EP (Pt. 2) (Relient K)

Released: October 4, 2011

Rating: 2.5 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “Interstate Love Song” (originally performed by Stone Temple Pilots) & “You’re the Inspiration” (originally performed by Chicago)

This is already the second time this year that a young band has performed a cover of the Wallflowers’ “One Headlight”: first by Parachute in concert and now here as the opener to Is for Karaoke Pt. 2.  My first thought on this is that this is suggestive of some communal desire, subconscious or otherwise, for more of the sort of music Jakob Dylan specializes in.  His band’s masterpiece Red Letter Days (2002) may have gone even more unnoticed than 2000’s Breach (as if that was possible), and Rebel, Sweetheart (2005) fared even worse, but perhaps the time is right for a new Wallflowers record.  I think I heard something about that being in the works…  But we’re here to examine Relient K’s second EP of covers this year.  This seems like an odd distribution plan, and though I downloaded both, I must admit that these might as well have been a set of individual downloads than two supposedly cohesive EPs.  The production quality of this second set of covers may be as high as the first seven (who could deny that after hearing their take on Cake’s “The Distance”?), yet the selection is decidedly less dynamic.  One of the standouts is their version of Chicago’s “You’re the Inspiration,” taking this epic love song into our decade, perhaps reminding some who have forgotten it.  (Though I’m not certain how expansive the market is for Relient K covers…)  The presence of certain tracks defies understanding; I have to wonder if they decided to tackle “Africa” simply because they stumbled across the same keyboard effect that Toto took for their own in the eighties.  Still, other tracks, like “Interstate Love Song,” are remarkably true to the original performances, and serve to further stretch Matt Thiessen’s range and show off his capabilities.  All told, I would download “Interstate Love Song” and “You’re the Inspiration,” maybe “Motorcycle Drive By” (originally by Third Eye Blind), return to Bringing Down the Horse (1996) for the Wallflowers version of “One Headlight,” and forget the rest.

 

People and Things (Jack’s Mannequin)

Producer: Jim Scott, Rob Cavallo, and Andrew McMahon

Released: October 4, 2011

Rating: 3.5 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “Amy, I” & “10 Days Gone” (Amazon Bonus Track)

As with 2008’s The Glass Passenger – which, by the way, gets name-dropped in “Hey Hey Hey (We’re All Gonna Die)” – People and Things is eminently listenable: always energetic, accompanied with passionate vocals, and all upon a foundation of rock piano.  Andrew McMahon is like the poppier Ben Folds: using piano to characterize his somber and reflective tunes, yet more predictable and, specifically, more predictably pop/rock than the aforementioned Folds.  This familiar style of arrangement works against People and Things concerning repeated listens, but once in the mood to listen, the album rolls out one expansive, epic production after another.  Some blend into the mix, none really falter, and a few rise up from the median: the heavily rendered ballad “Amy, I,” the near –scream of “Release Me,” and the gorgeously layered “People, Running,” not to mention the outstanding bonus track “10 Days Gone” (how that didn’t make the final cut is a head-shaker at best).  Jack’s Mannequin is a band I want desperately to hate, to despise for churning out formulaic piano indie pop/rock, and yet… I’m taken by it, every time; if only for that reason, I must recognize their achievement.  And they seem to be one of the few acts today – with a few exceptions, like the Wallflowers (see: Rebel, Sweetheart) – that understand how to use a comma, so there’s that…

 

The Lost Notebooks of Hank Williams (Various Artists)

Released: October 4, 2011

Rating: 3 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “How Many Times Have You Broken My Heart?” (performed by Norah Jones) & “You Know That I Know” (performed by Jack White)

I can’t stomach modern country music.  I review a relatively wide range of popular music: generally, if there’s a guitar or piano or some bass or drums in the mix, if the track is at least performed by an artist who wrote the song, I’m willing to give it a shot.  I’ve recently expanded my reach into rap a bit.  But country…  Country…  I’ll save this rationale for another time, but suffice it to say that my distaste for country music is specifically for that of the modern variety; when it comes to Johnny Cash, I’m in awe.  Some of his peers and predecessors receive the same reprieve in my book, Hank Williams being one of them.  How could I not reserve such a space in my musical heart for a hero of Bob Dylan?  So big a space, in fact, that I’m willing to grant the Alan Jackson performance of “You’ve Been Lonesome, Too” a thumb’s up.  Norah Jones, Jack White, Jakob Dylan, and Sheryl Crow: who could ask for a better variety of popular artists to balance out the more straightforwardly country artists who perform the other half of the songs on The Lost Notebooks of Hank Williams?  It’s a fascinating concept for a tribute album, really: take the lyrics to unfinished songs by Hank Williams, found with him after his death, and inject twelve new songwriting styles to put music to them.  What you end up with is a sort of collection of posthumous collaborations between Williams and contemporary artists.  Some have criticized the songs for being too flatly like Williams’ other originals, or too interpretive, strongly taking on the sound of the contemporary artist.  Regardless of your critical standpoint, it would be difficult to ignore this project as anything less than an interesting approach.  What would be the alternative: an album of covers?  Instead, curated by Bob Dylan and highlighting the second set of outstanding contributing performances by Norah Jones and Jack White this year, The Lost Notebooks is no Mermaid Avenue, but it’s almost on the level of Mermaid Avenue Volume II.  I would even recommend individual downloads for a more consistently enjoyable experience, but I wouldn’t suggest missing the liner notes that tie this project together.

 

The Best Imitation of Myself: A Retrospective (Ben Folds)

Released: October 11, 2011

Rating: 5 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “House” (new Ben Folds Five recording) & “Rocky” (Ben Folds demo)

More than sixty songs, an additional five-song EP via free download, expansive and fittingly funny packaging, and all tied together with detailed liner notes by Ben Folds himself: The Best Imitation of Myself: A Retrospective is, without argument, the best packaged Folds effort in a decade and perhaps ever.  Ever since the poorly designed barrage of EPs post-Rockin’ the Suburbs (2001), I’ve been hesitant about Folds’ non-album releases.  There have been more recent releases of questionable overall quality (the a cappella album, anyone?).  And yet, I had a good feeling about The Best Imitation of Myself, one that was confirmed in every conceivable way.  Whether you have loved his work since Ben Folds Five or have never heard of him before, I would strongly recommend picking up this set of essentials, live tracks, rare/unreleased songs, and three new Ben Folds Five recordings.  Speaking as someone who is not generally a fan of “best of” and “greatest hits” collections, I have no doubts that you won’t regret it. 

 

Bad As Me (Tom Waits)

Producer: Tom Waits & Kathleen Brennan

Released: October 21, 2011

Rating: 4.5 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “New Year’s Eve” & “Bad As Me”

Straight from the vocal chords that make modern-day Bob Dylan sound downright angelic comes an album from Tom Waits that, somehow without compromising his uniquely quirky – at times disturbing – sonic sensibilities, offers itself up as an immediately accessible work of artistic expression.  Its raw quality engineered by some of the best darkly folk musicians available, drawn together thematically by the failing state of the man, society, and morality in general, Bad As Me offers itself up to new realizations regarding vocals, instrumental performances, and perhaps most deeply through its lyrics with each listen.  The ramshackle stomp-rock of “Chicago” shakes the album to a start by riffing on escapist sentiments, “Raised Right Men” reinforces the reasons for leaving, and “Talking at the Same Time” adds a shockingly smooth quality to the mix, Waits’ voice rolling over the typically rough edges.  With nary a clunker in the set, all thirteen tracks of Bad As Me contribute hauntingly, fittingly to the stark culmination of the album in “New Year’s Eve.”

Mylo Xyloto (Coldplay)

Producer: Markus Dravs, Daniel Green, Rik Simpson, & Brian Eno

Released: October 24, 2011

Rating: 3 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “Us Against the World” & “Hurts Like Heaven”

Mylo Xyloto isn’t a step forward from 2008’s Viva La Vida, or Death and All His Friends, but it would be overstatement to suggest that it denotes a regression.  Instead, it is the logical blending of the pre-Viva La Vida style exemplified on X&Y (2005) with their new big picture perspective on the album.  As such, the concept-level of Viva La Vida isn’t quite achieved here, but neither is the uniform pop soundscape that came to a head for Coldplay in 2005.  Here, there are instrumental pieces added to provide transitions at key moments, and there is a sense that Mylo Xyloto embodies an attempt at cohesion (stronger in the first third than thereafter), a mixture of art and consumption-ready pop, clearly weighted toward the latter.  This is, after all, the band that, for three consecutive albums, has hit number one in all eleven countries deemed worthy of recognition in their Wikipedia profile.  Not a number two to be seen.  Last time around, the band’s work seemed much more worthy of the aforementioned accolades than this latest record, but Mylo Xyloto is far from a throwaway effort.  Why the world at large seems incapable of balanced criticism of this band, tending instead toward either blind devotion or deeply felt disgust, I will most likely never fully understand.  Simply put, Mylo Xyloto is good: it isn’t bad, but it isn’t great.

 

In the Key of Disney (Brian Wilson)

Producer: Brian Wilson

Released: October 25, 2011

Rating: 3 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “Colors of the Wind” & “You’ve Got a Friend in Me”

What, oh what, to write about an album of Disney covers…?  The eleven-track collection is surprisingly – or, given Brian Wilson’s legacy and recent track record, not surprisingly – In the Key of Disney is eminently listenable, adding maturity and characteristically Wilson-esque flairs to these children’s songs.  Some are transformed, as in the nearly perfect arrangement and performance of “Colors of the Wind” and the groovy rock version of “You’ve Got a Friend in Me,” while others offer greater resistance to assimilation into Wilson’s catalog at large, namely “The Bare Necessities” and, the admittedly typically brilliant vocal arrangements notwithstanding, the “Heigh-Ho / Whistle While You Work / Yo Ho (A Pirate’s Life for Me)” medley.  For the hardcore fan, In the Key of Disney won’t shake your faith in the master, but it probably won’t distract you for long from the news of the new Beach Boys material to be recorded by the four surviving members in 2012 either.

 

Ceremonials (Florence & the Machine)

Producer: Paul Epworth, James Ford, Charlie Hugall, Ben Roulston, Isabella Summers, & Eg White

Released: October 28, 2011

Rating: 3.5 / 5 stars

Top Two Tracks: “Never Let Me Go” & “Breaking Down”

As promised by Florence Welch herself, Florence & the Machine’s sophomore effort Ceremonials offers up more in the way of beats this time around, adding vitality to her murky lead vocals and the deep intonations of her piano work.  There is a decidedly heavier, more epic feel to much of her work here that makes good on the potential she demonstrated on 2009’s Lungs.  There is still a certain dynamic quality lacking in even Ceremonials, but this album certainly suggests a significant step forward, a surging of confidence in the tenor and energy of tracks like “Shake It Out” and “Never Let Me Go,” as in the compositional ambition and vocal saturation apparent in “Breaking Down.”